Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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