It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Let's paint friendship bongs
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
