I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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