My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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