? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
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