Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
