Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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