Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
