Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
