We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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