i just wanna soil my oats bro
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Randomize
