Will you blow on my dice?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Well I just put wine in my tea
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Randomize
