But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
