who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
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