I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
