does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Randomize
