More tranny stories later!
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
