This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
