One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
