this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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