once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
