I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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