You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize
