She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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