I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Come on in and take your pants off
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