I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
