he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
