great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
It's blow job season.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize