I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
