And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
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