I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
