Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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