Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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