i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Randomize
