I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
stop calling my apartment porn island.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
