you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
