I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize