Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
