I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
