but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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