No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
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