There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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