Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
