Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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