Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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