ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I'm at about main and main street
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Randomize
