there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I want her autograph on my taint
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize