D3 body, D1 cock
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Randomize
