just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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