Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
